Christians weighing in on Botkin Syndrome:
Excerpts from "Forgiving Our Parents, Forgiving Ourselves" by Drs. Stoop and Masteller.
From page 107:
Children who grow up in dysfunctional families quickly learn the unwritten, unspoken rules of the household. Here are some that are especially common:
1. We don’t feel.
- We keep our emotions guarded, especially anger (though often there is one person who is allowed to express feelings openly, especially anger).
2. We are always in control.
- We don’t show weakness. We don’t ask for help, which is a sign of weakness.
3. We deny what is going on.
- We don’t believe our senses or perceptions. We lie to ourselves and others.
4. We don’t trust.
- Not ourselves, not others. No one can be relied upon, no one confided in.
5. We keep the family’s secrets.
- Even if we are told, no one would believe us – or so we think.
6. We are ashamed.
- We are to blame for everything bad that happens – and we deserve it.