Thursday, February 19, 2009

Botkin Family Shame Existence Binds

The shame-bound family system is fixed in its form and highly resistant to change, even though change is a natural fact of life.

This system is analogous to peanut brittle, with each person fixed in stereotyped, inflexible roles and relationships to one another...

When change exerts enough force all at one moment upon a rigid system, it may break and splinter.

The shame-bound system does not have good capacity to absorb very much stress and still regain its integrity.
(pg. 61)

Excerpt from
Dr. David Stoop & Dr. James Masteller's
"Forgiving Our Parents, Forgiving Ourselves:
Healing Adult Children of Dysfunctional Families"
Regal/Gospel Light, 1996 (Servant, 1991)